Here’s the thing; Just as everyone grieves differently, heals
differently, we all have our triggers. Things that jump out of everyday life
and smack us like a 2 x 4. There you
are, feeling good and making progress and feelin’ all get down with your bad
self and then, BAM!.. a song, a scent, a story…it’s a situational minefield. You
do what you can, you excuse yourself to the bathroom, change the subject, look
away in hopes for a diversion. There is
death and violence and tragedy all around us, and just because I’m hypersensitive
to it most certainly does not protect me from it. And it’s hard, and it sucks. What makes it so annoying is that I thought I
had made such progress. I was dealing
better with the missing, the anger, the “No Fair!” of my mom’s death, and here
come the holidays. My mom LOVED the
holidays. She was all about love, and family, and warmth, and heart-felt hugs
when you left. I miss that. I miss it
like I would miss air, or food, or… well.
I have spent a lot of time trying to work through the horror of her
passing. I have spent, sadly, a lot of time working with friends and strangers
alike as they tried to process their own grief. I’m so much better than a year ago.
However, it is now “the holidays”. My kryptonite. So, I humbly ask you to be nice to your fellow
human this holiday season. The person
who cut you off in traffic, or cut in front of you at Macy’s, or maybe, like
me, is laughing a little too loud is, perhaps, trying hard to keep it together
while they struggle with something bigger than them. Just sayin’.. we all have a
lot to be thankful for.. if you’re not freakin’ out a little on the inside ~ be thankful for that. Peace to you &
yours..